Brad Meets the Fockers & Other Thoughts to Ponder...

It's Bachelor Brad: Meet the Fockers! Whooo!

Brad broods in his spiffy newsboy cap while trying to remember some things about his final four chicas. Oh yeah, um...Chantal's a cry baby. Ashley's bubbly. Shawntel's drama-free. Emily's got a ton of baggage but she's wifey material. Okay...

The bottom line we learned from this episode? Chris Harrisoncrest is the only therapist you need Brad. He and his little sweater vest are awesome!

THINGS THAT WERE HOT

Chunky Rings!

The one-shoulder dress.

THINGS THAT WERE NOT HOT

Fingerless Gloves. Especially in cold weather!

The newsboy hat? On Brad, not so much...

CHEESY FUN FACTS

Chantal lives only four blocks from mom and dad. With her dog. And 2 cats. Meow!

Ashley speaks French. Brad speaks Spanish and doesn't even know it!

HE SAID/SHE SAID

"What I can't deal with in a relationship is an emotional roller coaster!" -Brad

"I'm not going to end up with a guy my parent's don't like." -Chantal

"I'll be a damned good father!" -Brad

"What. In. The. Hell. Is my problem!?" -Brad

"I guess I'm just a weird guy." -Brad

"Ladies. Brad. It's the final rose tonight. When you're ready." -Harrisoncrest

SEATTLE, WA

Chantal and Brad

Memorable Moments:

Brad can see himself hanging out in Seattle. A LOT!!!

YEAH, we'll be in Austin!

Table Turner Chantal: "If they don't like you then you're OUT!"

Boca likes to bite. But he wouldn't bite Brad. Brad thinks Boca's a good judge of character. I think it's that Brad just doesn't taste very good...

Her dog and cats aren't going anywhere! It's a package deal Brad! Boca, Jinxy and Bailey are coming to Austin! Woohoo! Or not woohoo...

Booyah! Dad's wearing Brad's favorite color! And they're both self-made men! Awe!

Blessing #1? Check!

MADAWASKA, ME

Ashley and Brad

Memorable Moments:

Did I say "Si"? Oui!

Poutine - you can't eat that with a FORK! Like Duh Brad!

What date conversation? She was busy checking out his crowns. Sexy!

OMG Lobster! SHUT UP!

Vegetables on the honor system? AMAZING!

Lots of squealing!!! Make it stop!!!!

Um, apparently there was just the one couch in the house...

Ashley's sister is the girl with the dragon tattoo! For reals!

Brad in plaid with the dad!

Blessing #2? ???

CHICO, CA

Shawntel and Brad

Memorable Moments:

SHUT UP! Did we just see a commercial for Shawntel's family's funeral home!? How. Very. Odd...

Crypts. Cremation. How. Not. Romantic...

It's the crematory! Run, Brad, Run! Bwahahaha!

Brad gets comfy on the embalming table. OMG, Shawntel accidentally embalms Brad! Or something like that...

Shawntel: "Are you like creeped out OR WHAT!" Yeah. We are!

Dad Rick: "No rose for you!" Dad's wise beyond his years!

Shawntel's never leaving Chico. Not if the Newton family has anything to say about it...

Blessing #3? A very fishy "Check..."

CHARLOTTE, NC

Emily, Ricky Tick and Brad

Memorable Moments:

Brad would be shy around himself too!

A butterfly kite! SHUT UP!

A hug means he cares so much more than a kiss! It really does!

Grandpa Brad finally kisses Emily! See, it wasn't so bad!

Blessing #4? ???

GETTING ROSED

Ashley, Emily, and Chantal.

GETTING BROKEN HEARTED +
A FEW LOVELY PARTING SHOTS

Shawntel: I didn't see this coming...

THINGS TO PONDER

Anyone else think that to film at the funeral home they had to agree to run a commercial as part of the show!? My thoughts exactly!

What's with the blurring out of some of the paintings!?

Where was the rest of Emily's family?

BACHELOR FUN #8
DRESS PUZZLER

Which one of these dresses doesn't belong in the grand color scheme of things?!

Jenn:)

Women Scorned and 1 Scared Bachelor & Other Thoughts To Ponder...

This week it's Bachelor Brad: Swimsuit Edition! From lackluster one-on-one dates to the group date from hell, it was not a pretty sight. But on the positive side, if you didn't know who Bankie Banx was, you do now! Anguilla--good times!

THE ANNOYING LIST

Whining and crying. Enough already!

Robot Brad 2.0. Loosen up a little dude!

THINGS THAT WERE HOT

Purple makes a come back in Anguilla!

Rockin' the tiny fedora!

Frozen mojitos!

THINGS THAT WERE NOT HOT

Nothing says lovin' like a tramp stamp! Or not...

Grandma's slippers? Not so much...

CHEESY FUN FACTS

Ashley H. is a total Baywatch fan!

Brad Womack is no wounded soul!

Michelle's done some modeling before...

HE SAID/SHE SAID

"Just you and I kid." -Grandpa Brad to Emily

"I try to be cool and tough and all that but I fail miserably." -Brad

"Britt and Brad. Although it sounds really cute. Not only do I not see them getting married. I don't know if I even see them friending each other on Facebook." -Michelle

"WHOOOOO!" -Brad

"Group dates SUCK!" -Michelle

"Nice night." -Brad

"There's a BUT, here..." -Brad

"I gotta show these girls up!" -Michelle

"Your body language sucks with me!" -Chantal to Mr. Roboto Brad

"I'd like to think I'm a pretty decent guy." -Brad

"If I go home tonight I'm going to be %$#@!%& pissed!" -Michelle

"I'm breaking protocol for you." Rebel Brad to the Ladies

"Ladies. Brad. It's the final rose tonight. When you're ready." -Harrisoncrest

"I'm a lucky guy. I really am." -Brad

THREE THINGS I WOULD BRING
TO A DESERTED ISLAND:
PICNIC LUNCH, CHAMPAGNE, EMILY

Emily and Brad

Memorable Moments:

A helicopter? SHUT UP!

He calls her Em. Awe!

Brad's a knee slapper! Fun times!

Sandy Island? SHUT UP!

Brad's itching for his therapist when he can't figure out why he's so tense around Emily...

Brad: "We're losing the sun. And we're gaining the moon." Thanks Captain Obvious!

The SIGH...

Brad rebels and breaks some rules! Oooooh!

LET'S FIND LOVE ON THE STREETS OF ANGUILLA

Shawntel and Brad

Memorable Moments:

Riding bikes and waving to strangers! Good times!

Shawntel's perfect date? Hanging out at a farmer's market. Okay...

Nothing says Anguilla like drinking of out big melonish fruit, jump roping, and slamming dominoes!

Brad nearly bought the farm tripping through some jump rope! His bad!

Holy cow! It's Aunt Jemima. Love her pancake syrup. Mmm Mmm good!

Shawtel likes how friendly Brad is. HELLO! He lives in Texas. It's what we do!

Brad takes Shawntel and some goats for a picnic.

Kissing in the rain!

Let's make out to Bankie Banx! He's Anguilla's answer to Justin Bieber. So. Very. Um. Interesting?

She thinks it's the most romantic time in her life. I think it's the wine talking...

LET'S SET SAIL ON THE SEA OF LOVE

Britt and Brad

Memorable Moments

No rose Britt so you're totally coming home for sure...

A yacht? SHUT UP!

Cliff diving. How romantic! Or not...

As usual, Britt was a total weenie! But she jumped for a couple of Scooby Snacks!

We kept hoping Brad would feed Britt!

Brad has no urge to grab Britt and kiss her. He really doesn't.

Here's where the BUT comes in...

How does it end? Dumped on a dinghy!

THIS IS THE DAWN OF A NEW LOVE

Ashley, Chantal, Michelle and Brad

Memorable Moments:

Am I dreaming? No that's really Brad sneaking into your room at 2am!

You're in a Sports Illustrated Photo Shoot! WHAT?!?!?!

MJ Day: "Are you ready to feel sexy?" Um...Michelle thinks she looks atrocious and feels disgusting. Chantal feels like a "fatty." She regrets pigging out the last few days. Whoops!

Ashley: "NO BOOBS!"

Ashely was NOT going to take that top off. Unless she could cover up with tiny shells. Okay...

The girls all get competitive. Brad gets nervous.

Brad's reaction to Chantal taking her top off? "Oh! Oh! Oooohkay. It's off!"

We think, good grief! That's a really large black box!

Brad: "I think kissing Michelle went a little too far." Brilliant strategery Brad!

Ashley feels like Brad's kid sister. Um, gross?!

Brad's being closed off is secretly a true sign of respect for the ladies--in a very strange way. Or something like that...

Ashley: "You're scaring me" Like 100 times! MAKE IT STOP!!!!

They drank their sorrows away! And then the alcohol made them moody...The. Group. Date. From. Hell.

Chantal gives Brad love. Ashley gives him hair extensions. Ashley gets rosed. Go figure...

Smile for me? OK, no smiles then...

You OK? OK, guess not...

GETTING ROSED

Ashley, Emily, Shawntel, and Chantal.

As excited as the ladies were that Michelle went home, smiles quickly gave way to horror as they realized they'd lost their hairdresser!

GETTING BROKEN HEARTED +
A FEW LOVELY PARTING SHOTS

Britt: "It wasn't meant to be."

Michelle: "Snooooooze!"

THINGS TO PONDER

Do you think Brad will friend Britt on Facebook!?

BACHELOR FUN #7
GIVE HIM
THE BEST. EXIT. EVER!

Refuse to take his hand!

If he asks you if you want to talk. Say a simple but emphatic, "NO!"

As the limo rides off in the moonlight, lay down and take a nap sleepyhead. You've earned it!

Jenn:)