Welcome to another episode of Bachelor Pad--full of kisses, spitting, snark, and back stabbing. Wouldn't. Want. To. Miss. It! The kissing contest was so cheesy and yet mesmerizing. Elizabeth was excited to kiss them all--that is except for Weatherman. Poor Weatherman needed at least 1 cold shower after kissing Natalie. How about a germ bath!? Poor sweet little Tenley felt rejection from sweaty forehead Kiptyn. What's with the sweating!?
The brilliant strategy we learned from this episode? Couples aren't going to vote out couples, so let's vote off the singles! Yeah! Huh?! Brilliant strategists they are not ;)
WHAT NOT/TO WEAR:
NOT - From purple clown checks/polka dots to bright pink. That's hawt! Or, nawt!
YES - Loved Nikki's white dress paired with the gorgeous turqouise necklace.
WICKED FUN FACTS:
Wes knows pure science! And that don't come eaaaaasy!
Natalie knows some of these guys are pretty good kissers--from previous EXPERIENCE. Uh huh!
Wes is a total germaphobe!
Kissing boys is so funny to Tenley who's like 12!
Wes dreams about Gia every night.
David has a big mouth. Literally!
When he's not signing autographs for his fans down in Chihuahua Mexico, Wes doubles as a masseuse in his spare time.
Weatherman has a case of the Bachelor Pad Blues.
CRY FEST COUNT:
Wes and Gia
Elizabeth and Kovacs
Tenley and Kiptyn
Peyton and Jesse B.
David and Natalie
HE SAID/SHE SAID:
"Don't come on the show when you know there's going to be romantic challenges if you have boyfriend and then cry about something that you think is unfair." -Natalie
"I get to kiss them? Aaaand they're blindfolded?? I loooove the Bachelor pad!" -Weatherman
"It doesn't bother me at all to watch the other guys kiss Elizabeth. I know it's part of the game. I'm going to do the same thing." -Kovacs
"I just realized how gross this is." -Elizabeth on kissing the guys
"Big deal. We all did it in 6th grade." -Kovacs
"I would make out with everyone in the house for like 20 bucks." -Natalie
"I didn't think that everyone was going to turn into porn stars here!" -Gia
"I'm freakin' stoked for this! Whew!!!" -Weatherman
I'm a passionate person. I'm a passionate kisser. I'm a passionate lover." -David
"Elizabeth has ruined everything for me!" -Kovacs
"He's like the modern day Shakespeare. But better and cuter!" -Gia on Wes
"I don't think he's funny. I don't think he's cute. I don't like the guy." -Elizabeth on Weatherman
Worst Kisser: Weatherman
Weatherman's technique? "Such a bad kisser! He wouldn't stop kissing me. Uhhhhhaahhh" -Elizabeth
The guys' reaction to Weatherman:
Getting Rosed/Best Kissers: David and Peyton
WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS, STAYS IN VEGAS
Nikki, Krisily, Natalie and David
Natalie has a wild streak and she's headed to Vegas!
Going to Vegas with Nikki is like going to Vegas with your grandma!
Krisily's like 12 around David.
Natalie bounces on all the pool furniture like she's 3!
Natalie will do anything to get the rose, including taking her top off. She's THAT girl!
Group hug. Boobs and all. Oh boy...
Nikki laments, maybe she and Krisily should have gone topless and flashed him! Okaaay...
David and Natalie crossed that line! But what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas!
Getting Rosed: Topless Natalie
Dumped: Krisily and Nikki
GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENGINES!
Kovacs, Kiptyn, Jesse B. and Peyton
They burn some rubber! Tire rubber that is!
Kiptyn lies about how he feels about Tenley to get a rose from Peyton! Aaand it didn't work!
Rosed: Jesse B.
Dumped: Kovas and Kiptyn
15 DOWN TO 13:
Tenley and her little birds and animal friends too, Tattoo Jesse B., I Love Bears Natalie, Man Code Angry Dude David, Who? Gwen, Benedict Nikki, Cheatin' Wes, Bitchy Krisily, Dumb Smart Girl Elizabeth, "Kovacs" Jesse K., Abs Kiptyn, Perky Ashley, and Air Craft Carrier Peyton.
SOME LOVELY PARTING SHOTS:
Weatherman: Stupidity is rampant in this friggin' world. O yeah ;)
Gia: I'm an emotional wreck right now! Whaa!
The forecast calls for lots of crying and whining. Hopefully Harrisoncrest had a whambulance on standby. Make sure your mute button is working STAT!