Monday, March 16, 2009

Dancing With The Stars: The Melissa Season Week 2

Well, he finally brought a little jackass to the dance floor..and ended up in the ER! Steve-O couldn't compete, but the Woz (still in last place) more than made up for it. Or something like that...

If they keep having so many injuries, they're going to have to rename this show Dancing In The ER!

Of course they made us wait until nearly the last dance to see Melissa and Tony's sizzling salsa! Those marketing geniuses at ABC! And it was worth the wait. I was surprised at Denise's improvement, thought David Alan was a bit better than his scores, and was impressed with Ty's comeback! And did you all catch Denise grabbing 's Tom Bergeron's butt!?

Low to High Score Highlights:

The Woz & Karina

Len: Someone looked a bit like the Woz today?
CA: Trooper
Bruno: Like Wall-E, rusty around the edges but in need of some spare parts!

The Woz invited Bruno to dance with him...scary! Two words for The Woz: SPRAY TAN!

Score: 17
Total: 30/60
Prediction: He should go home!

Steve-O & Lacey

Len: He doesn't get it. Needs more salsar!
Bruno: Series of unfortunate events...
CA: Hopefully he feels better!

A little more salsa, a little less jackass! Who would have thought a salsa and a mic pack would send Steve-O to the hospital?!

Score: 14
Total: 31/60
Prediction: If back injury doesn't sideline him, he'll finish in about 9th or 10th place.

Ty & Chelsea

Bruno: He's hardwood in charge of the quick step!
Len: Last week a catapillar, this week a butterfly! Awe.

He's perfected the DWTS's super perky concentration face!

Score: 20
Total: 34/60
Prediction: Will end at 9 or 10 unless he improves radically!

Belinda & Jonathan

Len: Hip action lacking
Bruno: Let your hair down and shake it all about!
CA: Sit down Bruno!

For a minute I thought Pricilla Presley was baaaaaack! Aack.

Score: 18
Total: 35/60
Prediction: Finishes 10 to 13th

David Alan & Kym

Bruno: The face was good
CA: Lacking
Len: All sizzle and no sausage!

Bruno needs subtitles! Needs a little hope and change...

Score: 17
Total: 36/60
Prediction: Will place 8th or 9th

Lawrence & Edyta

CA: That's the way uh huh uh huh I like it
Bruno: Now that's a competetor!
Len: Much improved

Dammit! Bleep. Bleep. Bleep!

Score: 20
Total: 36/60
Prediction: Will finish 6th or 7th

Holly & Dmitry

Len: Your bust forward makes your butt stick out
Bruno: Try to catch up
CA: Like a dolly being drug around the floor...

Every day is a HOLLY DAY! Dmitri thought she said "holiday." Ha. Ha.

Score: 18
Total: 36/60
Prediction: Will go out 10th to 13th

Denise & Maks

CA: Fantastic!
Len: Much improved.
Bruno: Used her toes to her advantage!

She'd like to meet the guy who invented the Quick Step--because he CLEARLY didn't like his partner very much!

Score: 21
Total: 39/60
Prediction: Stays until final 8 or 9

Chuck & Julianne

Bruno: She did all the work!
Len: Sell this dance!
CA: A mishmash, not a salsa...

"OMG This is so embarrasing!" He's going to do it Derek-Style!

Score: 20
Total: 40/60
Prediction: Places 5th or 6th

L'il Kim & Derek

Bruno: Bling is coming out of every pore!
CA: Some performer!
Len: Not a lot of quality...

She's gonna show us (and the girls at da fed. pen) how elegant and refined she can be! Holla!

Score: 23
Total: 44/60
Prediction: Places 3rd

Shawn & Mark

Bruno: More naughty and flirty!
Len: Throw caution to the wind!
CA: Fantastic!

Mark does girly steps well and Shawn hasn't discovered her booty shake yet!

Score: 24
Total: 47/60
Prediction: Places 4th

Melissa & Tony

CA: Finally a real salsa!
Len: It made him gyrate on his seat!
Bruno: Now we are cooking! Juicy!

She needed to show herself she deserves to be here!

Score: 26
Total: 49/60
Prediction: Places 1st or 2nd

Gilles & Cheryl

Len: Not a one week wonder!
Bruno: Sparks!
CA: Makes the ladies swoon!

He's Super Gilles!

Score: 27
Total: 51/60
Prediction: Places 1st or 2nd


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