Monday, February 16, 2009

I'm Not Here For A Fling & Other Thoughts To Ponder...

Ok the most shocking and totally dramatic thing from this episode is...

I got some ice cream the other day at the market. Love that stuff! Anyhoo, I grabbed some pints of Haagen Dazs. The usual mix. Some vanilla. Some chocolate chip cookie dough. The usual suspects. I discover I got a pint of peanut butter chocolate! Like totally weird--I never get that flavor! So I'm watching the show, taking my usual notes, giggling at the cheese of it all. And I decided to just "chill" and I grab a bowl of this PB chocolate wonder during a commercial break. I'm digging in right at that moment our dear Mol asks J what his favorite ice cream is. He says--Peanut Butter Chocolate! How freaky is that?!

So then it came to me like a zany vision board in a flash of roses, cheesy one-liners, hot tub moments, champagne toasts and rejection limo rides of shame, that I just know how this is going to end! And how is it going to end, you may be wondering? ... I totally ate the whole bowl and it was AMAZINGLY delicious! And J's totally not giving Jillian a rose tonight. On to the show highlights...


Jill - Adorable. Fun. Funny. Strong. talk to! BUT, is she too independent?!

Mol - Attraction from the start. Gorgeous eyes. Stare at them. All night long. BUT, take it to the next level?!

Mel - Instant connection. Reminds him of MeAnna & His Ex. BUT, what about these missing parents?!

Jillian & Jason - Falling Off A Cliff...

Memorable Moments, Fun Facts, & Things To Ponder:

Jillian is the luckiest girl in the world! That is, until the next rose ceremony...

Another picnic and a blankie! Awe.

Jillian is looking for a best friend -- to help her search for the Ogopogo!

Jason freaks out at Jillian's dinner outfit after man-handle-hauling her out of the SUV!

What's with the winery dates with these two?! One in Canada, now in New Zealand! Is this the new "Sorry I'm Not That Interested in You, So You're Placing Third Bachelor Booty Call" ?!

Talk about a little hot tub grab a$! Cue the cheesy guitar music...

Chris Harrison's Note to Jillian & Jason:

Jillian and Jason, welcome to New Zealand! I hope you're enjoying your stay and that eerie moment when it seemed like Jason just might push you over that cliff because you were talking and rambling on and on and he just about couldn't take it any more! If you decide you can still trust him after that, you can use this key to run over to the fantasy suite and mack out awkwardly in the hot tub! And I'll throw in some hot dogs and some mustard on me. Love, Chris."

My Prediction: Sayonara Babe! Here's a couple packages of Oscar Mayer weenies as a lovely parting gift...

Molly & Jason - Falling Off A Bridge...

Memorable Moments, Fun Facts, & Things To Ponder:

Molly runs like a mile in the rain to greet Jason!

Molly says OMG! Like 1000 times too many! Make it stopppppppppp!

After arguing for like half an hour about how to count to 3, Jason and Molly take a huge leap of faith. Off a bridge.

Molly has a list of like 200 questions for Jason. And if he doesn't chill and answer them all, she's going to make him bungee jump again!

Jason's favorite ice cream is peanut butter chocolate. If he could eat only one thing it would be a hamburger. His favorite place is Greece. And he swears he saw Elvis in concert like yesterday while kicking it in some old-school Air-Jordan sneakers!

Nice fur rug under the dinner table!

Molly is not a mushy gushy kind of gal!

Could these words be a kind of freakish Fleissian Foreshadowing: Molly to Jason: "Are you afraid you'll pick 1 and then wish you picked another person?" Doh!

Molly totally takes control of the situation and gives Jason her own fantasy suite!

Chris Harrison's Note to Molly & Jason:

We didn't get to hear it, but I think it went someting like this, "Molly and Jason, Chris Harrison here. Molly like totally likes to be in control if you know what I mean, so grab this key and go jump in that spiffy white bathtub we've set up with the leaky drain! She's got another list of questions so you're in for a long night dude! Love, C-Man."

My Prediction: Sloppy Seconds = Future Bachelorette...Or Not....

Melissa & Jason - & The Mystery of the Missing Parents...

Memorable Moments, Fun Facts, & Things To Ponder:

The bar is totally set high after AMAZING dates with Jillian on a cliff and Molly's bungee jumping leap of faith! So Melissa & Jason hang out on...Winston Churchill's former boat! Okaaaay!

Melissa is always the dumpee, never the dumper!

Anyone else notice. They're in a steamy hot tub overlooking an AMAZING view. And Jason just can't stop harping about Melissa's missing parents! (Enter Producer: They're in the witness protection program dude! Now get over it and make out some more with Melissa!) Or something like that...

Chris Harrison's Note to Melissa & Jason:

"Melissa and Jason. Welcome to New Zealand. I hope you're enjoying your stay because I'm sick of writing out these cards, thank god this is the last one! I don't know about you Melissa but Jason has totally been enjoying his stay here if you know what I mean! We've convinced Jason to stop sleuthing around about your parents, so before he grabs that bone again, take this key and stay as a couple in the spiffy suite we set up for you. Be sure to charge your room service to Fleiss, he's the Big Kahuna. Love, Chris."

My Prediction: Ding Ding...We Have A Winner! OR DO WE?!?...


"How adorable is she!" --Jason on Jillian

"Want to do "the Titanic"? --Jason

"Thanks Babe!" --Jillian

"I have an AMAZING connection with Jason!" --Jillian

"I knew if we spent the night together it would be a long night." --Jillian

"OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" --Molly

"Am I the only one screaming?!" --Jason

"Let's do it again!" --Molly

"I took control. I think he liked it!" --Molly

"So this is a fantasy suite!" --Melissa

"I can't' get enough of Melissa!" --Jason

"I'm not here for a fling." --Jason


Was that a wine barrel or a whiskey barrel at the rose ceremony?! Classy!

Did anyone else think that was a mean joke that Molly played on Melissa when she told her they had to show up in square dancing dresses for a DO-SI-DO down at the next Rose Ceremony!

Did it seem like the girls were reading prepared statements in their final video pleas?!


Is this going to be like all those "most dramatic rose ceremony ever!" moments we keep waiting for with each passing episode?! That always turn out to be nothing! Or, do we have a doozy of a finale coming for once and for all in Bachelor Land!? What do you make of the following statement from Chris Harrison about the 1st After The Final Rose taping:

"What you are about to witness is potentially so dramatic, so emotionally difficult we decided out of respect for the parties involved to keep the taping of tonight's show as intimate as possible..."

Notice the candles in the background! Could it be a proposal of some kind? A seance with Naomi's mom for Rosie the suicidal dove?! Comment on your theories! Stay tuned...


1. Boobs or Butts?

2. Chocolate or Vanilla?

3. 7-iron or 9-iron?

4. Blondes or brunettes?

5. What time do you go to bed?

6. What's your favorite hamburger topping?

7. Ducks named Ted or ducks named Daffy?

8. Seattle or Michigan?

9. How many times have you watched Sleepless in Seattle?

10. Do you wash dishes?

11. Am I still the best kisser?

12. I think Cameraman Bob has a crush on me. So what are you gonna do about it?

13. Can we bungee jump again? Pretty please!

14. Can you draw another picture of me...without the joker mouth?

15. If I get you a last chance date gift, would you prefer a viking hat or a beret?

16. So I'm a lingeree girl. Assless chaps or boobie tassles?

17. Who's your favorite Bachelor from a past season of The Bachelor?

18. My favorite place is New Zealand cause it's really pretty. What's yours?

19. Do you like the bright green colored paper I wrote these questions on because I'd totally like to use it for our wedding invitations!

20. Could you really stare at my eyes all night long?


***Caps From Dreamer at Jokers. Thanks!***

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